


Wedding Bells

by noellehenry



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Côte d'Azur, Infidelity (not between Harry and Louis!), M/M, Pining, Stag Nights & Bachelor Parties, Wedding Planner Harry, Wedding Planning, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-03
Updated: 2018-03-17
Packaged: 2019-03-21 07:28:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13736055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noellehenry/pseuds/noellehenry
Summary: Louis Tomlinson is about to get married. He should be looking forward to his wedding day, except for… he isn’t. Instead he’s trying to avoid everything that involves table settings, wedding suits and cakes.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Just a fic with lots of wedding stuff and a happy ending... of course :-) There's an awful lot of pining, insecurities and doubt in this story, just a small warning.
> 
> To clear up the infidelity part: it's not between Harry and Louis. 
> 
> As always, a thank you very very much to [ Sam](http://britpickerhl.tumblr.com/), who corrects the grammar- and any other mistakes I make.
> 
> Tumblr post for the fic is [here](https://noellehenryfics.tumblr.com/post/171486879551/wedding-bells-by-noellehenry-rating-teen-and-up)
> 
> A translation in Spanish can be found [here](https://my.w.tt/AmG9BZaXeL)

                  

 

The sun is shining brightly over Santa Barbara. A perfect day for a wedding. Harry checks the wedding reception timeline once more. So far everything is going according to plan. The ceremony had been nice and memorable. The cocktail hour has begun after which, dinner and a reception will follow. 

Being a wedding planner for the rich and famous is a pretty demanding job. Everything has to be more than perfect. Today he’s in charge of  the wedding between a famous Hollywood film producer and a fashion model. He’s 49, she’s 23. The location is one of California’s most wanted wedding venues; a huge estate near Santa Barbara, with views over the ocean. 

Harry gives them two years at most, before an inevitable divorce will headline the gossip magazines. She has a younger lover, which Harry only found out by accident, when the bride to be had forgotten about her appointment with her wedding planner and answered the door, looking disheveled and with blushing cheeks, while an unknown young man came running down the stairs in only a pair of boxers, shoes and clothes gathered in his arms and rushing out the door, passing Harry in a hurry. Harry knew better than to comment. 

The happy couple has just returned with their photographer, shooting pictures at one of the most beautiful formal gardens in California. Their guests are in the estate’s garden, enjoying cocktail hour; appetizers served on silver plates and drinks in crystal glasses by staff dressed in black and white, as requested by the bride. The guests are all dressed up in cream coloured outfits. Men wearing cream coloured suits, women wearing cream silk dresses. That’s why Harry and his team are all adorned in cream too. The guests have started mingling and appear to be in a good mood; the alcoholic beverages are doing their jobs nicely. 

Harry makes his way towards the luxury marquis that has been set up on the other side of the garden. The caterers have done a splendid job. He gives Barbara, head of the catering team, a thumbs up and returns to the party. Smoothly, Harry’s team usher the guests to the marquis, making sure everyone is in their designated seats before the newly weds make their entrance. 

Celebratory dinner, served at the table, is a great success. The band plays jazzy tunes, while the guests enjoy their meal. The toasts by the bride’s father and the groom’s brother aren’t too bad, no embarrassing secrets are revealed. 

_‘If only they knew…’_ Harry thinks.

The couple have their first dance in front of their family and friends, all eyes on them. The film producer turns out to be a very good dancer, gliding elegantly with his new wife over the dancefloor. 

The bouquet toss is hilarious; the bride’s great-grandmother catches the lovely flowers. The woman, in her eighties, beams from ear to ear, while the other guests erupt in laughter.  
  
Harry’s team is in charge of the last two hours of the party, while Harry mingles with the guests. Socializing with potential future clients is a very important part of his business. 

He’s just taking a sip from his whisky on the rocks, when his phone buzzes in his suit jacket's breast pocket. Reluctantly he pulls it out. Hopefully it’s not one of his team members calling in case of an emergency. Harry looks at the screen. It’s a message from Niall. Harry frowns. It’s been a while since he’s been in touch with his old friend. He wonders what Niall has to say. 

_Tommo is getting married!!! We need to plan a stag weekend! Call me!_  
  
Harry drops his glass. It smashes against the wooden floor, content spilling on his shoes. He grips the nearest chair and sits down. His heart is beating too fast, he feels his throat tightening. Breathe in, breathe out slowly, his brain is telling him. He’s sure he hasn’t read the message correctly. Slowly he looks at the screen again. He has. The guy he’s been pining for since he first laid eyes on him is getting married. It shouldn’t be such a surprise to Harry. Louis has been engaged to Eleanor for two years now,  it’s only natural they are finally tying the knot. He knew, of course he knew this would happen one day. It’s the reason why he left England and set up business in California. 

The band starts playing ‘The time of my life’, the last song before the party is over. Harry can’t wait for it to end. He wants to go home, withdraw from all the festivities, put on joggers and a T-shirt and cry himself to sleep. 

However he’s still on duty. With the utmost difficulty he stands up, takes a deep breath, tucks  the phone back in his pocket and puts on a fake smile. 

His team is already escorting the wedding guests outside the marquis, so the married couple can make a grand exit while rose petals are being tossed at them by their guests. 

When all the guests have left, Harry speaks to his team. 

‘Thank you all very much, you’ve worked hard today. Go home, get some rest.’ Harry tells them before they all go back to their cars and drive back home. 

***

Harry closes the door of his beach house behind him, kicks off his way too expensive shoes and gets out of his Gucci suit. He needs a shower first. 

His briefs, he throws in the hamper before he grabs a fluffy powder blue towel from the cupboard and walks into the shower. He stands under the rainfall shower head, letting the soft nebulised streams falling down, over his body. The tension in his muscles is slowly waning. He rests his head against the cold tiles. 

Louis is getting married. He swallows. Why can’t he move on? It was never in the cards for him. They’d been friends. Just like he’s friends with Niall and Liam. Ever since secondary school they’d been the best of friends, the four of them. Going to football matches and school parties together. Clubbing and late night movies in university. Harry always had a soft spot for the older, smaller boy with the bright blue eyes. Admiring the way he socialized with people. Everyone always seems to be drawn to Louis. He’d been their leader, the one who came up with ideas, good or bad, supporting his friends, caring for all of them. Louis had been the first person Harry came out to. He’d been an excellent wingman when they went out. Too bad, Harry had only been interested in the wingman himself. But Louis never noticed. And Harry never gave up hope. 

The first crack in his heart came when Louis got his first girlfriend; a relationship that didn’t last very long, like so many secondary school relationships do not. For a while it had been only the four of them, partying and goofing around. Until Liam and Louis both found girlfriends again. This time they lasted, more or less. Liam and Sophia are no longer together, but Louis and Eleanor on the other hand, got engaged. That’s when Harry decided he needed to get away from Louis, move on, get over him. He had a small business as a wedding planner in London and moved it to California, with some help from acquaintances and former, rich, clients, he’d been able to make a name for himself in Hollywood. Business has been booming for him ever since the move. 

Harry turns off the shower and grabs the soft towel to dry off. He puts on old joggers and a T-shirt and walks to the kitchen. His housekeeper, Elise, has placed the mail on the kitchen table. There are several wedding invitations, as usual. He picks them up. Clients, except for the cream coloured envelope; her Royal Highness Queen Elizabeth’s profile is sitting in the right top corner of the envelope. Harry reluctantly opens it, dreading the content that it holds. He pulls out the card, unfolds it and reads. 

_Please join Eleanor and Louis as they join in union, Saturday, June 16th 2018 at Hambleton House, reception to follow._  

He sits down, tears clouding his vision. This is it. It’s official. Louis is getting married; it’s printed in front of him on fancy paper. He lets his tears run freely. One last time he will let himself cry over Louis Tomlinson.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The rest of the story is from Louis POV.

‘Liam, I’m leaving now. I’ll sign those contracts in the morning.’ Louis Tomlinson pushes the pile of papers to the side of his desk with a sigh of relief. He longs for a run. He checks the clock. He’s got time. He could still go for a jog in the hills, shaking the tension from his body. Nothing like a run in the Yorkshire hills. It’ll do him good. Get rid of the stress, clear his head.  
  
‘What do you mean ‘In the morning’?’ Liam’s voice comes from the desk on the other side of the room. 

‘In the morning, as in the next day, somewhere between 9 a.m. and noon?’ Louis rolls his eyes at Liam. Liam looks back with his brown puppy eyes, shaking his head. 

‘What?’ Louis asks, a little irritated. 

‘You have a fitting tomorrow morning.’ Liam replies exasperated. Louis looks back in confusion. ‘Wedding suit? Does that ring a bell?’ 

‘Fuck!’ Louis mutters under his breath. How could he forget? Liam shakes his head once more. 

In two weeks he, Louis, will be a married man. 

‘I knew that!’ He quickly says. Liam just glares at him. 

‘Just go home and do whatever it is you need to relax a little, mate.’ 

‘Fine! I will!’ Louis grabs his jacket and flees the office. 

The drive to Hambleton House is only half an hour. The house he inherited when his mother died. It’s tucked away in the Yorkshire Hills, surrounded by lush green fields and moors. Tiny white spots move slowly on the hills, the view of sheep grazing all day long. He feels already much better, nearing the estate. 

He’s just changed into a tracksuit when his phone rings. 

‘Liam, you’re missing me already?’ He teases when he picks up. 

‘Actually… NO!’ Liam replies firmly. ‘I just wanted to let you know that Niall and Harry will be coming to your wedding! Isn’t that great news?’ He suddenly sounds a lot more enthusiastic. 

‘They are? That is definitely good news. When will they arrive?’ Louis can’t help but smile, thinking about his friends. He misses them dearly. 

‘Friday!’ 

‘Fantastic, that is great news. Can’t wait to see them!’ Louis sighs happily. 

While running he thinks about Liam’s phone call. Niall went back to Ireland after graduating. He’s the manager of a well-known Irish golf player, travels a lot around the world. Louis misses him. They were always having fun together, teaming up to pull pranks on others, getting drunk a lot on nights out. Both him and Niall are loud and outgoing. It’ll be good to see his Irish friend again. 

And Harry. Sweet, kind and handsome Harry. The baby of their group of friends. Always caring, a little shy and introvert, but fun-loving. He wonders why Harry left England so suddenly two years ago; eager to expand his business in Hollywood? He hasn’t seen him ever since. Harry doesn’t use Whatsapp, nor is he very active on social media. His Instagram is a portfolio for his business; wedding venues and cakes. Hell, he can’t even remember when he spoke to Harry last. 

He runs the last mile back to the house, takes a shower and sends a message to Dan, his stepdad, asking what time he should pick him up in the morning. 

‘So, the quartet assembles on Friday?’ Dan grins at Louis when they return from the fitting. 

‘Haha, yes we are. Looking forward to it. I haven’t seen Niall and Harry in what feels like ages. It will be nice catching up.’ Louis smiles, while he steers his car, a vintage Aston Martin convertible, to the Deakin house. 

‘You better make the most of it; it will be your last get together as a free man.’ Dan winks at him. 

Louis drops him off and drives back to Hambleton House. He hears his phone buzzing. It’ll have to wait until he’s home. 

_‘Booked us a honeymoon; a cruise to the Caribbean Islands.’_  

Louis groans. He should be looking forward to their honeymoon, but spending two weeks on a bloody boat, sipping cocktails poolside is not his idea of a nice getaway. He had given  Eleanor free reign to pick out her dream honeymoon and this is apparently it. 

He’d proposed to her after drinking a little too much; he only remembers it vaguely. Niall, Liam and Harry were there, when he did. Eleanor had accepted with a squeal. She’d been ecstatic. Almost started planning their wedding right away, while Louis, when he’d sobered up, had been utterly confused and scared when he realized what he’d done. All three of his friends had confirmed he’d proposed to Eleanor in their presence. It would be horrible if he’d backed out. They’d been dating three years before Louis proposed, it now is two years later and the date of the wedding is approaching rapidly. He’s getting cold feet, correction… ice cold feet.

 He can’t stay away from work that long. He immediately calls Liam. 

‘Eleanor booked us a fortnight on a cruise to the Caribbean! I can’t possibly go away that long! Is there even internet connection on a ship? She’ll have to cancel.’ He panics on the phone. 

‘Geez Tommo, calm down! I hope they don’t have internet connection on that ship. You’re supposed to be on honeymoon, enjoying yourself, romantic dinners, lazing by the pool, sipping colourful cocktails and have lots of sex.’ Liam replies incredulously. ‘Besides, being co-owner of the business, I think I can manage two weeks without you.’ 

‘Oh.’ Louis answers a little helplessly. 

‘Louis, listen to me. You need to chill. You know what, I’ll plan us a stag weekend. Just you, me, Niall and Harry. How does that sound? We’ll do all kinds of fun activities, have a good time, just the four of us.’ 

Louis wants to protest, but actually, a weekend with his friends might be fun, so he gives in. 

‘Fine! You do that. I need to go.’ He huffs. He hears Liam laughing before he hangs up. 

He knows he must appear to be a very reluctant groom to Liam. Eleanor never visits the office, because he doesn’t want her to. There isn’t a picture of his future wife on his desk either. He makes a note to himself, he’ll have the photographer take a nice picture of her at the wedding and he will put it in a frame on his desk. He and Liam work almost day and night. It’s been a long time since he’d spent an entire day with his fiancée. A quick dinner or lunch, a night out at the theatre, those were the times they saw each other. And whenever Eleanor brought up the word ‘wedding’, he always found an excuse to flee the room. 

He isn’t madly in love with her. Not like Dan and his mum had been. They had been very happy together, but his mum isn’t here anymore to give him her motherly advice. At times like this he misses her even more. Maybe a love like theirs is just one in a million. Not everyone finds ‘the one’. 

*** 

‘Tommo, Payno! Good to see you!’ Niall shouts while he walks towards them. Crushing both men in a bear hug. 

‘Niall, welcome mate!’ Louis greets him with a grin. How good it is to see him again. 

‘Niall. Glad you’re here.’ Liam says. ‘Let’s get some coffee. Harry’s flight arrives in an hour.’ he continues. They find a quiet spot in the coffee corner. 

‘I can’t believe you’ve got the keys to Rory McIlroy’s country house!’ Liam exclaims, when Niall dangles the keys in front of his nose. 

‘Connections, mate!’ Niall wiggles his eyebrows. ‘Unlike Lou’s place, this one has a golf court and swimming pool.’ 

Louis rolls his eyes at that. Of all of his friends, he’s the only one who grew up on an estate, heir to the family wealth. His friends’ families were not exactly poor, but none of them were owners of a massive estate and grand house. 

‘Lads, Harry’s flight is arriving. Let’s go!’ Niall ushers them out of the coffee corner, after he’s scanned the arrivals board. 

It takes them a while to get to arrivals. They wait, impatiently, for their friend to appear through the doors. 

‘There he is!’ Niall shouts as he waves frantically to draw Harry’s attention to them. 

‘Yeah! I can see him! Harry! Over here.’ Liam joins Niall in his excitement. Louis sees him too, but he’s tongue tied, not a sound seems to be able to leave his throat. 

Wearing tight black skinnies, a floral patterned shirt, mostly unbuttoned, sunglasses perched on his head, a black bag slung over his shoulder, Harry looks like a bloody moviestar… and… 

‘What happened to his hair?’ Louis finally utters in shock, because the last time he’d seen his friend, his curls had been shoulder length, long and wavy. 

‘Mate, he’s had this haircut since last year! Have you guys even been in contact? Like at all?’ Liam looks at him in disbelief. 

And…, okay he’s only had and sent the occasional text on their birthdays, Christmas and New Year’s wishes, but that was about it. In all honesty, he’s lost contact with Harry since he moved to LA. Apparently Liam and Niall had done a better job of being Harry’s friend. Louis feels a little ashamed and guilty. 

Harry waves at them with a big smile and points towards baggage claim and mouths ‘See you there.’ 

Louis follows Liam and Niall, who are extremely excited to see Harry. Louis is really happy to see him too, but there’s something else, a feeling, something unidentified that makes him feel a little uncomfortable. It’s not only his guilty conscience, neglecting their friendship. It’s a feeling much deeper. He shakes his head. He’s being weird. Is this what all future grooms experience? Unease, uncertainty, panic? God, he really wishes the wedding day was over already so he could go on with his life. 

Niall hugs Harry, Liam follows and finally it’s Louis’ turn. Had Harry always been this tall? He wraps his arms around his friend’s waist, while Harry slings his long arms around his shoulders and hugs him tightly. 

‘I missed you, Lou. So much.’ Harry whispers in his ear. 

‘Missed you too, Haz. It’s lovely to see you.’ Louis replies softly. 

Liam drives them to Rory’s house. Niall whistles when they drive through the gate. 

‘One day, I’ll own one of these too.’ 

‘Think you might have to start playing golf professionally yourself, instead of managing a player, Niall.’ Louis quips from his seat in the back. 

‘Yeah, yeah. We can’t all be estate owners, like Louis Tomlinson.’ Niall retorts. 

‘Trust me, it’s a lot of work and worry, being the owner.’ Louis sighs exaggeratedly. 

‘Poor Lou.’ Harry mock comforts him, nudging his shoulder. Liam grins. He’s heard all of Louis’ estate complaints for hours on end. 

‘Wow, it’s amazing.’ Liam says when they’re standing in front of Rory’s house. ‘Can’t wait to explore.’ 

Niall opens the door and one by one they walk inside. Niall whistles a few times, showing his appreciation for the grand kitchen, the cinema screen size tv in the living room and the swimming pool at the back of the house. 

‘Okay, let’s find the bedrooms.’ Niall runs up the stairs like an excited child. ‘Anyone who has a preference?’ Niall asks when they’ve inspected the bedrooms. 

‘I’d like the room with the balcony… you know, for smoking purposes?’ Louis says apologetically, because it’s the master bedroom. 

‘You smoke… again?’ Harry asks him in wonder. 

Louis sighs. 

‘Yeah… since a few months. Lots of stress.’ He explains lamely. 

‘Weddings can do that to you, I know.’  Harry nods thoughtfully. ‘I’ve even seen a bride taking up smoking cigars to sooth her nerves.’ 

Niall bursts out in laughter. 

‘Fine Lou, you take the master bedroom. I’ll have the one with the view over the golf court.’ The other three men snort, because… of course Niall would pick that room. 

‘I’m not fussy. Harry which one would you prefer?’ Liam asks. 

‘I’ll take the one with the floral wallpaper.’ Harry picks up his bag and suitcase and disappears in the bedroom, adjoining the master bedroom. 

‘I’ll be next to yours then.’ Liam says to Niall. 

Louis opens the doors to the balcony and grabs a cigarette and lighter from his pocket. There’s a chair on the right. He sits down, leans his legs on the balustrade and lights his cigarette. He inhales deeply before he blows out the smoke. He closes his eyes for a bit. 

It’s good to be by himself for a few minutes. It’s great to have his friends here. He’s just not used to Niall’s loudness anymore. Even Liam is more lively outside the office. And Harry… he’s lovely as always, but somehow Louis views him differently than all those years ago when they were always around each other. 

He forgot about the deep voice that always speaks so slowly, like he’s searching for words to say. He forgot about the dimples in Harry’s cheeks when he smiles. Were his eyes always this green and wide? His lips full and pink? And his legs long and well shaped?

Louis can’t remember. They must have been. Eyes don’t change colour overnight, do they? Why hadn’t he noticed these things about his friend before? Harry is beautiful; he must be very popular amongst the men in LA. Is he in a relationship? God, this is bad. He realises, he doesn’t know any of it. 

Liam knocks on his door.

‘Niall is about to order us some food. What do you want?’ 

‘Curry!’ Louis shouts back. 

‘I’m going downstairs, find me in the kitchen when you’re ready.’ 

Louis quickly freshens up and closes the bedroom door behind him. 

Niall and Harry are looking over the menu of the takeaway nearby. Niall places the order and hands them each a beer from the fridge. 

They gather in the kitchen, standing at the bar, chatting. 

‘So, Harry, what is life like in sunny California?’’  Liam asks. 

‘Busy.’ Harry replies cheekily. 

‘Any famous people who hired you for their wedding plans?’ Liam continues. 

‘A few. Can’t give any names, sorry. But there have been actresses, film producers, models.’ Harry leans on the bar counter. 

‘How many are divorced now?’ Louis asks casually. 

‘Jeez, mate! You’re really in a mood these days. Not every marriage ends in divorce, you know.’ Liam shakes his head. 

‘Sorry.’ Louis apologizes, still awaiting Harry’s answer. 

‘A few, not that many. Even in Hollywood they manage to stay married for a couple of years.’ Harry continues, looking at Louis, a little confused. 

‘Hey, how come Harry isn’t your wedding planner?’ Niall suddenly asks in wonder. 

‘Yeah… how come?’ Harry places his hands on his hips and stares at Louis. 

Louis rubs his neck, feeling a little flustered, because Louis had come up with the idea, but Eleanor was dead against it. 

‘Well, uhm… eh… El wanted someone outside of our friends circle. Besides, you wouldn’t have been able to enjoy the party, right? You’d have to stay professional and run around like a lunatic to have everything run smoothly.’ Louis explains a little weakly, when he sees the flash of hurt on Harry’s face. 

‘I see. So you mean I can get thoroughly plastered at your wedding?’ 

‘That’s the idea.’ Louis says, voice wavering. 

‘Harry mate, we’re so gonna party at Lou’s wedding! I’m looking forward to it.’ Niall high fives Harry with a huge grin. Harry smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. 

Louis feels like he fucked up once more. He wishes life were more simple sometimes. 

The bell rings, signaling the delivery man with their hot curry. Niall pays him and they take their food and beers to the living room. 

‘What’s the plan?’ Louis asks while taking a bite. 

‘Ah… well, tonight we’ll just stay in. Let Harry get used to British time. He’ll be knackered by the end of the night.’ Niall winks at Harry. ‘So we’re going to watch movies on this massive screen.’ 

‘Good. Nothing crazy then. I like that.’ Louis smiles at his friends. Liam rolls his eyes. 

They pick out the first movie, My best friend’s wedding, followed by Four Weddings and a Funeral and Louis groans wholeheartedly, making his friends burst out in laughter. Apparently there’s a theme for their movie night, he should have known. 

Three hours later, Liam is trying to stifle his yawns behind his hand. Niall is typing on his phone, Harry is softly snoring, stretched out on the couch, his head in Louis’ lap, while Louis is carding his fingers through Harry’s short curls, smiling as Harry’s forehead frowns when Louis tugs a little too hard on a loose curl. 

He’s beautiful like this, his features soft and content while he’s off in dreamland. It makes Louis feel warm inside; this handsome and sweet man is one of his best friends and the man who will win his heart is going to be one lucky guy. A sting of jealousy goes through Louis’ heart, thinking about that possibility. He swallows. What is wrong with him? He’s in love with Eleanor! He thinks of Eleanor, partying with her friends this weekend. Maybe her friends hired her a male stripper. He grins at the thought. 

‘I’m going to bed.’ Liam announces. 

‘Me too.’ Niall stands up from his seat. 

‘I’ll try to wake Haz. See you guys tomorrow.’ Louis smiles up at them. Liam raises an eyebrow watching Louis’ hand in Harry’s hair. Louis quickly removes it. Harry pouts in his sleep. 

‘What are the plans for tomorrow?’ He quickly asks. Liam grins. 

‘Be ready by nine. Niall will give you your outfit for tomorrow morning.’ 

‘Should I be worried?’ Louis is convinced his friends will make him wear something embarrassing. 

‘Nah, it’s not an outfit you usually wear, but nothing ridiculous. Promise.’ Niall yawns. 

His friends walk upstairs. Louis pulls on a curl and calls softly. 

‘Haz… Harry… wake up, love…’ 

Harry moans and shifts a little. Louis sighs and slowly moves his other hand to Harry’s side and mumbles ‘Sorry Haz’ as an apology in advance while he softly tickles Harry’s side. 

Harry sits up with a jolt. Confused he looks around. Louis chuckles. Harry rests his gaze at Louis’ face. 

‘You’re mean!’ He points his finger at Louis. 

‘Sorry. Pulling your hair didn’t work, I had to think of something else to wake you up. Liam and Niall went to bed and we should too. Apparently we’re supposed to be ready by 9 am tomorrow.’ 

Harry sighs deeply while he sets his feet on the floor. 

‘I’m tired. Can’t I stay here?’ He pouts exaggeratedly. 

‘Nope, you’ll regret it in the morning. Your back will hurt. Come on, I’ll help you upstairs.’ Louis offers. Gently he takes Harry’s hand and helps him up, Harry slings his arm around Louis’ shoulders and lets Louis lead him upstairs. 

‘Here you are.’ Louis opens the door for Harry. ‘Good night, Haz. Sleep well.’ Before Louis can move away, Harry wraps his arms around Louis’ neck and hugs him tightly. 

‘I missed you so much these past two years.’ He admits with a sad sigh. 

‘Missed you too, Haz. Get some sleep, yeah?’ Harry leans back. A curl is clouding his left eye. Louis automatically reaches to put the curl back in his place. Harry sleepily smiles at him. 

‘See you tomorrow. Sweet dreams, Lou.’ Harry turns and walks into his room and softly closes the door. Louis takes a deep breath and walks to his own room. Once inside he leans against the wall. His heart is pounding in his throat, too fast. His stomach is doing somersaults and he has trouble breathing steadily again. What is happening to him? Why does he feel such a strong attraction to his friend? Why now? Harry is still… Harry. What changed? They’d always been tactile with each other, Harry is a cuddler and it had been fine all those years. Why is Louis’ heart beating like mad now? Why is his stomach doing gymnastics in a way Louis didn’t think it possible? Is this what they call butterflies? It feels more like a bird flapping its wings violently. 

Louis walks to the bed, quickly undresses, goes to the bathroom and looks in the mirror. 

‘You’re stressed because of the wedding, that’s all. Most grooms probably feel like this.’ He tells his reflection. Although, maybe not all grooms are suddenly attracted to their male friend. He pours cold water over his face. He just needs a good night’s sleep. He’ll be fine tomorrow.

*** 

Harry gets in position while Niall promotes the game. 

“Golf is a great game for all ages. There is nothing like getting outside on the golf course with good friends and smacking a ball around. Exercise, fresh air, friends and laughter - that is golf! According to Wikihow.com.” 

Liam laughs.

‘I should have known! Mate, I don’t even know how to play golf!’ Louis exclaims. He’s wearing black trousers, a blue polo-shirt and a cap. There’s a golf club in his hand and he has three white balls in his hand. Niall and Harry snicker, the bastards. They are both experienced golf players. Louis looks pleadingly at Liam. 

‘Sorry mate! Don’t look at me. I haven’t played before either. We’ll just have to suffer together, I’m afraid.’ Liam apologizes, his hands raised in defense. 

‘Come on, Tommo. There are balls, there’s a hole…’ Niall starts, but Harry is already doubling over in laughter. Niall raises a brow at him. 

‘I don’t think Louis is interested in balls, you’ve got us mixed up.’ He clarifies once he’s able to speak again. Niall claps a hand over his mouth and now Liam bursts out in laughter. 

Louis just blushes a deep red; only a day ago he would have joined Liam in his laughter, but now… When Liam stops laughing and both Niall and Harry look at him a bit confused, he says. 

‘I prefer big balls. Now show me how this works.’ He regains his composure and raises his eyebrows at Niall. 

‘Right, well just look at me first.’ 

Half an hour later, Louis is about to throw his golf club as far away as possible. Golf is so frustrating. He either misses the ball or it flies in a totally different direction than Louis aimed for. Liam doesn’t fare much better; he’s left a trail of holes in the grass where he’s been trying to hit the ball with his club. 

Niall and Harry, on the other hand, smoothly direct their golf balls in the designated holes, high fiving each other. 

After Louis misses once again, Harry comes up to him with a smirk on his face. 

‘Ball trouble, Lou?’ He sweetly asks. Louis is tempted to throw his last ball at Harry’s head. 

‘Give me a football and I’ll show you!’ Louis plants his hands on his hips, challenging Harry. ‘See who will win then!’ 

‘Not me, that’s for sure.’ Harry admits with self-knowledge. His long limbs were not designed for football he used to claim when they played together and he tripped over his own feet most of the time, trying to get to the ball. ‘Now, just look at me and copy me.’ 

Harry stands to the side of the golf ball, faces it, his feet are set shoulder-width apart. He bends his knees slightly and pushes his hips back. His spine is leaning just a little forwards toward the ball and holds his golf club by the grip with both his large hands. 

Louis is a little distracted, seeing Harry’s bum in this position. His throat is dry and he swallows. 

‘It’s really important to have a good stance.’ Harry explains looking over his shoulder at Louis. Louis quickly moves his gaze from Harry’s bum to his curly head. There’s a slight blush on his friend’s cheek. ‘Uhm… did you get that?’ Harry asks a little uncertain. 

‘Yeah, yeah. You’re a good teacher.’ Louis replies immediately, although he can’t remember any of what Harry just told him. 

Harry continues his lesson. He brings the club up and around himself to set up a good, strong swing, urging Louis to copy his movements 

‘Now you try to lead with the head of your golf club first, and let your hands, arms, and shoulders follow it in that order.’ Louis frowns at the instructions, but tries anyway. ‘ Finally, to finish the windup, twist at the hip. This will allow you to get the maximum amount of power out of your swing without losing your balanced stance.” Harry continues his monologue, while Louis does his utmost best to follow the, complicated, instructions from his friend. His tongue is between his teeth, showing his focus on the game. 

Harry shows him how to swing the club and of course, his pink golf ball, soars through the air, landing close to the hole. Liam and Niall applaud and Harry takes a bow. 

‘That, my friend, is how you play golf.’ He winks as he turns to Louis. ‘Your turn.’ 

Louis groans, all eyes are on him. He tries to remember what he’s supposed to do, he sticks his bum exaggeratedly almost up in the air while he bends his knees. He hears Liam chuckle and Niall cackle. Harry however is silent. 

‘Teach, how am I doing?’ He shouts. He has to wait for an answer, so he glances over his shoulder. Harry is staring at his bum, mouth open slightly, eyes wide and focussed on what he sees in front of him. Louis quickly looks back and swings the club in the air and back and …. The ball flies across the field in the nearby pond. 

‘I’m done.’ He says as he turns around. Harry is looking at him weirdly. Niall whistles and shouts 

‘Congrats Lou! You finally hit the ball!’ 

Liam just grins. 

In the afternoon, after a delicious lunch that Liam ordered from a nearby restaurant, they relax in the sun, beside the pool. 

‘This is so much better.’ Louis sighs contentedly as he closes his eyes and makes himself comfortable on the lounger, wearing his favourite red swim shorts, aviators covering his eyes and a bottle of water at hand. 

‘I agree.’ Liam, next to him, answers. His well-build body glistening in the sun after he’s put suncream on. Louis is too lazy to apply any on himself. Niall is passed out on a towel in the shadow. His Irish skin is not suited for the sun; he turns red in an instant. 

Harry is doing laps in the pool. Louis secretly ogles him from behind his sunglasses. Harry is tan from the Californian sun, and his body is covered in tattoos; a bird on each side of his chest , a huge butterfly on his torso, his left arm shows a beautiful ship and there are fern leaf designs on his hips, drawing attention to his pelvis. He’s just stunning. Louis can’t help but smile. Harry dives underwater and a few moments later appears on Louis’ side of the pool, shaking his head to remove his hair from his eyes. He slowly lifts himself up, the muscles in his arms contract as he does and climbs out of the pool, water dripping from his body, the yellow shorts revealing a little too much as he walks towards the chair next to Louis, grabbing his towel. Louis can’t help but stare at the almost naked man, next to his chair. Thankfully his aviators hide Louis’ inappropriate staring at his best friend’s perfect body. Harry dries himself off and drapes the towel over the chair before he sits down. He picks up the suncream and then whispers to Louis. 

‘Lou… are you awake?’ Louis fakes a yawn and mumbles. 

‘Hmm… what?’ 

‘You need to put on some sunblock, you’ll burn.’ Harry sounds concerned. 

‘I’m too tired.’ Louis yawns again. 

‘Too lazy, you mean.’ Harry replies with a chuckle. ‘Come on, I’ll do it. You’re the VIP this weekend after all.’ 

‘Now you’re talking! I deserve to be pampered.’ Louis agrees wholeheartedly. He hears Liam snort on his left side. ‘Hush, Payno.’ Louis tries to silence him. 

‘Close your eyes, while I apply the cream, sir.’ Harry says mischievously. 

Louis giggles when he feels a blob on his nose and Harry pats it softly, after which he softly smooths the cream to Louis’ cheeks and forehead, moving around the aviators and his chin. 

Then Louis feels a cold blob on his chest and stomach, soft fingers draw on his front, using the cream as paint. 

‘What on earth are you doing?’ Louis whispers with a laugh as he tries to see what Harry is drawing. 

‘Ssh, you never should disturb an artist while he’s creating a masterpiece.’ Harry silences him. 

‘Are you using my body as a canvas?’ Louis fakes outrage. ‘My body is a temple.’ 

‘And I’m worshipping it.’ Harry winks at him. Louis sputters at that. He feels himself burning up. Liam, still lying next to him, bursts out in laughter. 

‘You’re both ridiculous. I’m going to get us something to drink.’ Liam shakes his head as he walks into the house. Niall is still in dreamland. 

‘You’ve got a beautiful body.’ Harry says while he slowly finalizes his body painting.

‘Uhm… eh, thanks’ Louis says a little taken aback. He looks down at his body and frowns as he tries to make out what Harry created. 

‘It’s a heart. You drew a heart.’ He quietly says as he looks up at Harry. His friend stares at him with his big green eyes, there’s a hint of sadness in them and something else, like a fondness, but then stronger. 

‘Why a heart?’ Louis asks softly. 

‘Isn’t that what this weekend is about? You’re getting married. Stag weekend, wedding, hearts… love.’ Harry whispers, still staring at Louis. 

‘Yeah… yeah, it is.’ Louis swallows. The tension between them is something he’s never experienced before. He doesn’t like it. Nor does he like the sad look in Harry’s eyes. 

‘Drinks, guys! Wake up, Niall!’ Liam shouts as he emerges from the house with a tray full of drinks and snacks. 

Louis quickly rubs the heart shaped cream over his torso and arms, dries his hands on the towel and accepts a drink from Liam. He doesn’t look at Harry, who is now silently sitting in his chair, sipping from the gin and tonic Liam handed him. 

The rest of the afternoon is spend in the pool, more ball games and a race, which Liam wins easily.

***

‘How do I look?’ Louis turns around in front of the dressing mirror in his room. Liam sits on the bed. 

‘You look good, Lou. It’s not as if you have to impress some girl, you’re already covered, mate. It’s us, your friends, who should worry about their appearances.’ Liam leans back on the bed. 

‘Hey, that doesn’t mean I can’t look good. If I’m the wingman I should at least look acceptable.’ Louis nods to himself in the mirror, happy with his outfit. Tight fitted black jeans, a black band T-shirt and a black suit jacket. Liam is wearing identical jeans and a white button-down, looking dapper. Niall sticks his head around Louis’ bedroom door. 

‘You guys ready?’ Liam gives him a thumbs up. 

‘You?’ Liam asks, still lounging on the bed. Niall comes in and turns around, showing off his dark blue jeans and a pale blue button down. 

‘Great look.’ Louis compliments his Irish friend. 

‘Wait until you see Hazza. He’s going to turn some heads.’ Niall looks meaningful at them. ‘Haz! Come show us your outfit, mate!’ He shouts towards the door. A  moment later, Louis feels his jaw and his heart drop when Harry enters the room. He looks a little shy. He’s wearing white skinnies and a vintage pink sheer button down, the top four buttons undone. Even Liam is speechless watching Harry. 

‘Told ya!’ Niall says triumphantly. 

‘Mate, you look awesome!’ Liam is the first to regain his speech. Louis can only stare with his mouth open. 

‘Louis?’ Harry looks nervously at him. ‘Don’t you like it… it’s too much, isn’t it? I’ll go change.’ Harry turns on his heel and is about to leave the room when Louis finally gets out of his trance. 

‘NO! Hazza, wait! You look beautiful, love.’ He hastily shouts. Liam raises an eyebrow. 

‘We’ll escort you. No doubt you’ll pull tonight, mate.’ Niall grins at Harry. 

‘I … I don’t want to…. pull, I mean.’ Harry says quietly, still unsure about his outfit for the night. 

‘Let’s go! The cab is waiting outside.’ Niall breaks the sudden silence. They gather their phones and wallets and leave. 

The club is amazing. They have a booth for themselves. Liam opens a tab for them and brings in the first set of drinks for the night. 

They raise their glasses and Niall says. “To Tommo and El, to a happy ever after!’ 

‘Cheers!’ Liam adds, Louis thanks them, Harry smiles weakly. 

They chat for a bit, taking in the club’s atmosphere, admiring the carved mirror frames all around the walls, before Liam asks Harry to join him on the dancefloor. Niall and Louis watch them. Louis laughs as he sees Liam doing moves that Harry tries to copy. 

‘You like your stag weekend so far?’ Niall asks him. 

‘Yeah, I do. It’s good to see you guys and spend time together. I feel a lot more relaxed, if I’m honest.’ Louis replies sincerely. 

‘Liam said you were very uptight and we’ve all noticed that you are avoiding talking about the wedding. Aren’t you excited?’ Niall continues, while he sips from his beer. Louis looks at him. He decides to be open. 

‘I’m not. I’m dreading next Saturday, honestly.’ He sighs heavily. 

‘Is it just the ceremony you’re dreading or … the entire concept of marrying Eleanor?’ Niall asks cautiously. 

Louis downs the rest of his beer. 

‘The ceremony for sure. Marrying El… I don’t know, Niall. Most days I want to run from it all and pretend I never proposed. What if I make a mistake? I don’t want to make her life miserable, just because I’m uncertain about all of it. She’s so looking forward to the wedding and our life afterwards. She even mentioned kids. And I… I don’t know if I’m ready for this, but I can’t back out now, can I? I’d break her heart. I don’t know, I don’t make sense. Just forget it… Let’s have another drink!’ Louis is off to the bar, before Niall can stop him. 

They don’t talk about the upcoming marriage after that. Liam and Harry come back to the booth, laughing loudly. 

‘Didn’t know Liam had those moves. God, I’m exhausted.’ Harry lets his head rest against the headrest. 

‘Hidden talents, mate.’ Liam drinks the beer Niall plants in front of him. ‘Oh, they’re doing karaoke later on, anyone want to sign up for that?’ Louis refuses immediately, Niall is in and Liam and Harry decide to do a duet. When they come back, Niall downs another beer. Louis smirks at him. 

‘What you’re going to sing?’ 

‘Kiss.’ Niall shakes his head and points at Harry. ‘His fault. I’m not drunk enough for this.’ 

Harry giggles as he hands Niall another pint. 

‘Prince version?’ Louis teases. 

‘Yeah right, if you step on my toes I might be able to sing those high notes. Nope, Tom Jones’ version of the song.’ Niall rests his head on his arms. Liam, Harry and Louis look amused at their friend. 

‘What about the two of you?’ Louis turns to his other friends. 

‘Surprise, mate. Not going to tell you.’ Both Liam and Harry make zip motions to their lips. Louis groans, because if they won’t tell, it’s going to involve him for sure. 

An hour and many drinks later, it’s Niall’s turn to perform. Louis and Harry hang off each other laughing, wiping the tears from their eyes as Niall struts across the small stage, winking at the audience and making obscene gestures with his body. The crowd loves it. Liam is holding his head shaking it while he too is laughing. 

‘You should make a career of it, you’ll be a hit.’ Liam tells Niall when his friend slumps down in their booth, totally exhausted..

‘Liam Payne and Harry Styles are next.’ a guy on stage announces. Louis and Niall give them a thumbs up, while the pair make their way through the crowd. 

‘So, we’re singing this lovely song for our best friend, Louis Tomlinson, who’s getting married next Saturday.’ Liam tells the audience through the microphone. 

The crowd whistles and Louis hides his face behind his hands. The first tones of the song come through the sound boxes. Louis recognizes it immediately. It’s ‘Endless Love’ by Lionel Richie and Diana Ross; one of Harry’s favourite songs. Niall drags Louis by the hand towards the front of the stage, even though Louis protests loudly. 

‘Shut up, mate. They’re singing this for you.’ Niall shouts at him. 

Their friends sound good together. At first they sing the song to each other, then they turn towards the audience, until Harry spots Louis. From that moment on,  it’s just Harry and Louis in their own little bubble. Louis can’t keep his eyes from Harry who is singing his lyrics convincingly to Louis. Louis feels himself getting emotional, he’s had way too much to drink. He’s normally not this emotionally shaken by a song. Harry’s eyes glisten too and his last words sound a little choked. 

The audience applauds and whistles when Liam and Harry finish the song. Both men jump off stage. Niall claps Liam on the back. Harry stares at Louis, Louis stares back, opening his arms and Harry almost falls into them. Louis hugs him and whispers. 

‘That was so beautiful, love. Thank you.’ Unable to express his true feelings, Louis just hugs Harry a little tighter.

‘I meant it.’ Harry’s voice sounds broken. Louis holds him a little longer. He doesn’t know how to reply. Liam and Niall watch the scene in front of them in silence, with concerned looks on their faces. 

‘Let’s go home, please. I’m so tired.’ Harry pulls back with tears in his eyes. They all nod in silence. None of them knows what to say. 

The cab drive home is quiet, all of them lost in their own worlds. They say goodnight to each other and walk to their rooms. Louis trails behind Harry. When Liam and Niall close the doors of their rooms behind them, he takes a deep breath. Harry lingers at his own door. 

‘Harry…’ Louis starts. 

‘Please, Lou, don’t.’ Harry says, leaning his head against the door, not looking at Louis. ‘It’s hard enough as it is.’ 

‘But…’ 

‘No, you don’t have say anything. I know I’ve been silly, crushing on you all these years. I know you don’t feel that way about me. It’s… alright.’ He turns his face to Louis, a tear falling from his eye. 

Louis’ hand comes up to stroke Harry’s cheek. He leans his head closer and softly kisses his cheek. Harry turns towards him, a pleading look in his eyes. 

‘Please…’

 


	3. Chapter 3

Louis opens a bleary eye and immediately closes it again. His head hurts badly. He turns on his side. His hand brushes against a warm body. He smiles and shifts closer, wrapping his arm around her waist. He presses a kiss to the naked shoulder, his hand travels lower. A moan comes from beside him, a very low moan. Louis freezes and slowly opens an eye. Broad shoulders, short curly hair. The body shifts and turns. Two sleepy green eyes look at him smilingly. Harry leans forward and presses a kiss on Louis’ lips.

‘Morning, love.’ Harry’s hand travels over Louis’ body. ‘You’re so gorgeous.’

Louis is still in shock and unable to move at all. Harry frowns.

‘What?” He asks.

‘I’m naked… you’re naked.’ Louis stutters finally. Harry grins.

‘Well, yeah? Sex is a lot easier that way.’ He winks at Louis. Louis jolts upright and immediately regrets it. His head is pounding like crazy. He groans, rubs his hands over his face.

‘Lou? What is wrong? Are you alright?’ Harry touches him softly in concern.

‘Yes...NO! I mean, what do you mean with sex…?’ Louis feels despair taking over his body.

Harry frowns again in confusion.

‘Y...You don’t remember?’ He asks carefully. No, Louis doesn’t remember anything. He shakes his painful head and looks at his friend, who shifts away from him.

‘No! What should I remember? I remember coming home from the club and… that’s it.’ Louis replies in despair.

‘In that case. I think you should go to your own room.’ Harry’s voice comes icily from next to him.

‘But...I” Louis looks at Harry, confusion and desperation apparently visible on his face, because Harry stares at him with hurtful eyes.

‘Go, Louis.’ Harry turns his back to Louis as he lays down on the pillow. Louis quietly gets out of bed, gathers his clothes and leaves the room.

***

When Louis wakes up again, in his own bed this time, it’s already late in the afternoon. He dreads going downstairs. He showers quickly and throws on shorts and a T-shirt. It’s quiet downstairs. He finds Liam in the kitchen. No sign of Niall and Harry.

‘Hi.’ he greets Liam with a weak smile.

Liam looks up at him with something that can only be described as disgust.  
‘We’ll leave as soon as you’ve eaten something. I’ll be outside.’ Liam walks out of the kitchen without another word. Louis makes tea and toast; he doesn’t even taste them. Too wrapped up in what happened last night after they’ve come back from the club. He expects Niall and Harry to be outside too.

He quickly washes the cup and plate, walks upstairs, and packs his bag. Outside Liam is leaning against the car, boot is open.

‘Put your bag in there, I’ll lock up.’ He instructs. Louis looks around, no sign of Niall and Harry.

Liam gets in the car, Louis sits in the passenger seat. When Liam starts the engine, Louis can’t take it any longer.

‘Okay… where are Niall and Harry?’ He asks, a little annoyed. Liam glares at him.

‘They drove to Holmes Chapel, to Harry’s mum.’

‘Oh… didn’t know they were going to visit Anne today.’ Louis replies a little surprised.

‘They weren’t…’ Liam drives away from the house. They don’t talk for a long time. Liam is determinedly looking straight ahead, with a disapproving frown between his eyes. Louis is staring through the side window, racking his brain over what could have possibly happened last night and why doesn’t he remember.

After filling up the tank at the petrol station and Louis getting them coffee and a sandwich, Liam stops at the car park behind it, Louis is tired of the tension between them.

‘Just say it, okay? I’m sick of this. I must have done something so awful that two of my friends fled and the other one is ignoring me. Just have it out, will you!’’ He almost shouts at Liam.

‘Just… fuck you, Louis! How could you do that to him?’ Liam immediately spits back in anger.

‘Do what? I assume you’re talking about Harry? I don’t remember anything after coming back from the club last night, okay?’ Louis replies exasperated. ‘Next thing I remember, is I’m waking up next to him, stark naked and he’s talking about ….uhm…’

‘You can’t even say it! You slept with him… you made promises….For fuck’s sake Louis, how drunk were you?!’ Liam glares at him again. Louis throws his arms in the air.

‘Very, apparently, because I don’t remember any of it!’

‘Great! You really fucked up this time, mate.’ Liam throws his empty foam cup in a bin and goes back to the car. Louis takes his cup with him.

‘I just don’t understand why you’re so angry at me. If, and I say, IF, had sex with Harry, that means he was there too. Were you angry at him too? Or am I the only arsehole here.’ Louis leans his head against the seat.

‘You are.’ Liam says and with that, their conversation ends. Liam drops him off at the house.

‘See you at work tomorrow.’ Louis says with an even voice.

Inside he checks his phone for messages. Several from Eleanor and one from Niall. He reads Niall’s text.

‘You’re an arsehole Tommo. Fuck you!’

He throws his phone aside, Eleanor just has to wait.

***

Work is tense that week, Liam hardly speaks to him. Eleanor is freaking out, behaving like bridezilla, Niall and Harry ignore his texts and Louis just wants to disappear, preferably to a deserted island far away from everyone and everything. He’d never expected the week leading to his wedding to be as awful as it is.

On Friday he sits upright in bed, eyes wide open.

He is meant to be getting married tomorrow. His breathing is stuttering when he looks around the room. As of tomorrow night, this will be their room. Eleanor will have her things moved in in the next week. It feels so unreal to him. He lays back on the bed. His mind goes back to another dark haired person. Harry with his beautiful green eyes, his sweet kisses, his soft large hands roaming Louis body. The soft spoken words that night. Words of promise, longing and …. love. It all comes back to him now and he wants to scream. He’d given in that night, to a longing he didn’t know he had before. It had felt better than anything he’d experienced before. He’d felt whole, he felt love...he. Oh God, he loves Harry… He’s sure of it. This feeling… it’s so different, it feels… right. He softly sobs in his pillow. He made a mess of it all. And now… it’s too late to change anything. He’s going to have to live with it for the rest of his life.

He needs to go through with the wedding. Everybody expects him to marry El, his family, her family, their friends. He’s going to have to live up to the expectations, despite his own feelings. El will run Hambleton House and the estate with him, she’ll be the perfect partner. It is sensible to marry her. He won’t let her down. They’ve been together for many years. And Harry… he’ll have to forget about him. Hah! Harry probably won’t ever speak to him again anyway, not after last Saturday night.

Louis tries to convince himself it was only sex. A fleeting moment. A few minutes out of all the hundreds minutes he had shared in Harry’s company. He’d better just say nothing about it ever again. He’ll deal with the disapproving looks from Liam in the future, it will pass.

This… thing that happened between him and Harry was so wrong, on every level. He keeps reasoning to himself, although he feels himself crumble at the thought of never seeing Harry again.

His phone buzzes, it’s Dan, his stepdad, inquiring about some last details before the wedding rehearsal.

Later that day his house is full of family and relatives, he hasn’t seen or spoken to in ages, and friends. Every room in the house is occupied, much to Louis’ dismay. He’s glad his sisters Lottie and Fizzy are in charge, he couldn’t deal with all the fussing himself, not today anyway. He dodges a few poles and jumps over cables. Marquees are being set up, tables and chairs are placed in neat rows, a small stage is being placed in the corner of a marquee. Louis rubs his face, he needs to get away from here.

He walks to the garden, only two of his aunts are walking around, admiring the flowers. He sits on a bench that is secluded from the garden and leans back. His mind keeps going back to Saturday night, he can’t seem to shake the event from his brain.

He’s shaken from his thoughts by Fizzy, who always seems to know where to find him.

‘God, this is awful. I don’t think I’ll ever want to get married.’ She groans as she sits down next to him.

Louis smiles weakly, he totally agrees, but it would be a bit awkward to admit it to his younger sister.

‘Can you believe El is whining about the napkins being a wrong shade of yellow and that it ruins the entire table setting? Apparently the florist ordered the wrong flowers too. So El’s been yelling at your wedding planner for doing an awful job and that she’ll never recommend her to El’s circle of friends and then she just fired her from the job.’ Fizzy throws her hands up in the air and rolls her eyes.

‘Oh...uhm, should I go inside?’ Louis asks insecurely, he’d rather not.

‘No! Please, stay here. Lottie already dealt with it. Harry is coming to take over, he’ll be here any minute now. I’m supposed to be on the look-out for him. If I were you, I’d hide here until everyone has calmed down. I’ll go and wait for Harry.’ Fizzy kisses him on the head, before she heads off again.

The minute she’s out of view, Louis hides his face in his hands and shakes his head.

‘This is a nightmare.Please, can someone wake me up?’ He whispers to himself despondently.

Once he leaves his safe hiding place, he immediately spots Liam, who comes up to him giving him a small wave. Louis already stops moving. What does he want? Is Liam going to bite his head off… again? He already braces himself for what Liam has in store for him. Instead his friend greets him with a smile.

‘Hi. You can come out now. Everything’s under control now that Harry’s taken over. Lottie and Fizzy are lounging on a chair on the terrace with El and her friends. Everyone seems to be relieved. He’s very good at this. You should have seen him giving orders and making calls, while he stays collected and friendly, reassuring El everything is going to be absolutely fine.’ 

The rest of the day seems everlasting. Although Louis doesn’t have to do much, except for keeping polite conversations with relatives and friends, the night seems to go on and on. He hasn’t talked much with El, who seems perfectly happy spending time with her friends, laughing and giddy from the wine that’s been flowing since the afternoon. He’s been carefully avoiding Harry, partly because he doesn’t want to be in the way and partly because he has no idea how to approach him without causing pain, tension and awkwardness between them.

He’d best keep away from him until the wedding is finally over and Harry will, without a doubt, return to California.

After the wedding rehearsal, there’s dinner for their family and friends. Lottie and Fizzy chatter happily, including him in their conversation. Eleanor is sitting next to her parents and looks happy. Liam, Niall, who arrived just in time for the rehearsal and Harry are seated on the other side of the table. Liam apparently compliments Harry about his work today. Niall claps Harry on the shoulder. 

Louis doesn’t eat much. It feels so wrong, everybody’s having a great time, except for him. He should be over the moon, having all of his family and friends gathered at his house, enjoying themselves. He’s going to get married tomorrow, everything is organised to perfection, he should be having a ball. Except for, he doesn’t feel like it at all. His stomach is in knots, he feels nauseous, he needs to go outside. Once dinner is over he heads out of the grand door, stepping onto the terrace. He takes out a cigarette from the package that’s been tucked away in the pocket of his jacket. He lights it and takes a deep breath.

‘You’re avoiding me.’ A deep drawl comes from behind him. He looks over his shoulder and sees Harry leaning against the wall of the house, watching him.

‘I didn’t want to get in your way while you were saving the wedding day.’

‘Bullshit!’ Harry calls out. And Louis knows he’s right, but decides to avoid confrontation.

‘Thanks for taking over. El is much more relaxed now.’ He tells Harry in a voice that sounds foreign to himself.

‘You think you’re going to get out this, by just avoiding the subject? You’re wrong. I deserve an explanation, Louis, you owe me that, at least.’ Harry is standing much closer now. He can feel him breathe down his neck.

‘I wish I could give one, Harry. But I can’t. My mind is chaos, my heart a mess. I don’t know what I want anymore. I’m at a loss. My wedding is tomorrow, El is looking forward to it, everyone is, except for me, because I don’t know if I’m doing the right thing. But I can’t back out now. That wouldn’t be fair to anyone, especially Eleanor. You have to understand that. No matter what happened the other night. I have to go through with this, I owe El and everyone who knows us. I can’t just put everything aside for a drunk one night stand.’ Louis answers so softly only Harry can hear.

‘One night stand?’ Harry whisper shouts. ‘That’s all it was to you? Thanks, Louis, but not really. I’ll go back inside.’ Harry turns around and disappears inside.

Louis feels tears in his eyes. This is the second time he hurts his friend. He’s a lousy friend and a lousy future husband too. In fact, he sucks.

After he’s finished his cigarette he takes the back door, going up to his room. Tomorrow is decision day and all will fall in place. He and El will live happily ever after… hopefully.

No matter how tired and miserable he feels, sleep eludes him. He keeps tossing and turning until he finally falls asleep in the early morning hours.

‘Just stand still for a moment will you? So I can tie your tie.’ Lottie sighs as she tries reach up and fasten Louis’ tie with her expert hands.’ She stands back, while Louis fumbles with the sleeves of his shirt.

‘Now you look like a true groom.’ She smiles encouragingly at him. He might look it, but he sure doesn’t feel it.

‘Thanks Lots.’ He thanks her nevertheless. He regards himself in the dressing mirror. He does look handsome in his navy suit. Now if only he could manage a genuine happy smile and turn the gloom switch in his head off; all would be perfect.

‘You look lovely too. I’ve got pretty sisters.’ He smiles weakly in the mirror, looking at his sister.

Lottie rolls her eyes and then she asks him.

‘Are you happy, Louis?’

He steels himself to face her searching look.

‘What a question on the morning of my wedding,’ he tries to joke, but the concerned look on his sister’s face only deepens.

‘I know you proposed to Eleanor out of the blue on a night out while you’d been drinking. Liam told me…’ She says when he wants to protest.’You hardly exchanged words with El, nor have you spend much time with her in the past months. Honestly, the way you’ve been avoiding everything that concerned the wedding is worrisome. So I ask you again. Are you happy, Louis?’

‘Everything is going to be fine, Lottie. It’ll work out. It’s just nerves.’ He reassures his sister and himself, in a way too. He just hopes he isn’t making the biggest mistake of his life. 

***

The small church in the tiny Yorkshire village is crammed. Some guests are standing in the back, since the seats are all occupied, other guests are snugly waiting outside under a canopy trying to get a glimpse of the wedding through the open church doors.It’s a beautiful, sunny day. Perfect for a wedding day. The first rows in the church are filled with family members and close friends. Most of them are talking excitedly amongst themselves, except for Niall, Harry and Liam; they are sitting silently in their seats, waiting for the ceremony to begin. Harry is nervously picking at the seam of his jacket. Niall squeezes his knee, trying to calm his friend. Liam stares towards the side door where Louis enters the church, accompanied by Dan, who is his best man. Louis quickly glances around, his face is pale, almost ashen. He finds Harry, sitting between Niall and Liam. Their eyes connect just an instant, but it is enough for Louis to feel the sting of a physical ache and spot the wetness in Harry’s eyes. He forces himself to tear away his gaze and focus on what is to come.

The first notes of the traditional Wedding March swell through the church. The guests all rise to their feet and glance aside to get a view of Eleanor and her proud father, walking down the aisle together in a slow pace. Eleanor’s dress is beautiful, a white princess style dress, with a sweetheart neckline, lace bodice, and a silk ballgown skirt flowing gracefully as she walks. Near the altar her father steps aside, while Eleanor hands her bouquet to her bridesmaid and turns to Louis. She smiles brightly. Louis just nods, no smile visible on his face.

He feels terrible, this is wrong. He shouldn’t be standing here, he should have told Eleanor a long time ago, he wasn’t ready for marriage, that he was wrong for her. She should marry a man who truly loves her, not Louis, who isn’t even sure anymore if he ever really loved her, or that it was just a convenient relationship, a friendship. He never felt for Eleanor, what Dan had felt for his mother. In the distant he hears the vicar’s speech. It’s as if he’s an onlooker instead of the groom.

“Do you Louis William Tomlinson take Eleanor Calder to be your wife – to live together after God’s ordinance – in the holy estate of matrimony? Will you love her, comfort her, honor and keep her, in sickness and in health, for richer, for poorer, for better, for worse, in sadness and in joy, to cherish and continually bestow upon her your heart’s deepest devotion, forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto her as long as you both shall live?’ Louis is brought back to the present with a start.

‘Uhm…. eh…..no? I….I can’t. I’m sorry.’ He stutters hardly audible for his surroundings.

Next to him, Eleanor pales and looks at him in horror. She opens her mouth, but then closes it again for a loss what to say.

‘I’m so sorry, El.’

The guests erupt in confusion. Eleanor’s parents lead their daughter quickly outside through one of the side doors, while the public whisper among each other, some of them equally shocked, some of them giggling nervously.

Louis just stands there, until Dan and Liam take him by the arm and lead him to the side door to the small room from where he’d entered the church only a few minutes before. 

In the room, Dan sets Louis on a chair and pulls out another one for himself, Liam stands in front of him. They’re silent, lost for words. Dan rubs Louis' back to calm him down, looking up at Liam in confusion, waiting for an explanation. Liam just shakes his head briefly.  
  
Louis speaks after a few minutes almost in trance.

‘I don’t love her, I never knew how it felt. What you and mum had… I never felt that for Eleanor.’ Louis says with a shakily voice. Dan sighs and hugs him.

‘Louis, you can’t compare what your mum and me had. You and El,... you’re different people.’

‘But I know how it feels… just not with her. I love somebody else.’ Louis whispers.

Dan opens his mouth, but then closes it again. Liam lets out a gasp.

*** 

The next days go by in a blur. His sisters, Dan and Liam take care of cancellations, payments and everything else that come with cancelling a wedding last minute. Louis tries to resume work, but is unable to focus. Eleanor and her best friend have gone on the cruise, the one that was supposed to be their honeymoon treat. He hasn’t spoken to Niall or Harry after that awful moment in church.  
He looks out of the window in the office, the rain is falling steadily outside. It makes him feel even moodier than he is already.

‘Louis Tomlinson, I want you to get out of here. Take a holiday, get some rest.’ Liam calls sternly from his desk. Louis looks up at his friend, he nods. Liam is right, even though he hates to admit it.

‘You’re right, I need to get away. Thanks Liam.’ He spends the rest of the afternoon handing over his appointments to Liam and by 5 p.m. he heads out of the office, shrugs on his jacket, fishes his car keys from his pocket and drives to Hambleton House with music playing softly in the background while he drives and focuses on the road in the bad weather.

‘I need sun.’ He decides when he finally arrives at the house and runs towards the front door, to keep from getting soaked.

His housekeeper left him some food in the oven. He sits down at the kitchen table, opens his laptop and scrolls through various sites, looking for a sunny destination, while he enjoys his meal and secretly praises his housekeeper for her superb oven dish.

That night Lottie calls him; he tells her about his plans and asks her for advice.

‘I just can’t decide where to go. It’s been years since I went on holiday and never on my own.’ he whines.

‘Why don’t you go to Bellevue, gran’s summer house in France?’ Lottie offers.

‘Lots! You’re a lifesaver, that is the best idea I’ve heard in ages. God, do you remember how much fun we had together at that place? And the food!’ Louis sighs with a hint of nostalgically. Lottie giggles.

‘Yeah, that’s where you discovered fresh baked pizza.’ She teases him.

The next day he packs his suitcase, calls Gina, Bellevue’s housekeeper to let her know he’ll be arriving the next day. He calls Liam to let him know he’s going to France for a few weeks, just in case...

He lands at Nice Airport and looks through the tiny window of the airplane,waiting until most of the passengers have gathered their belongings from the luggage storage above the seats before he gets up and grabs his own bag. He smiles and sighs when he takes the steps down to the tarmac. The sun is shining brightly, which improves his mood a lot.

He rents a car, a mini cooper with open top, throws his suitcase and bag in the backseat and jumps behind the wheel, heading to Antibes. It has been about eight years since he’s been here last.

On his way to Bellevue, he muses about the past week.

He had hoped to speak to Harry after he’d destroyed his own wedding day. But when he finally managed to escape the church, both Harry and Niall had already left.

That night he’d tried to call Harry, but Harry didn’t answer his phone, much to Louis’ frustration. He’d been at a loss. Harry could only assume Louis cancelled his wedding because of him, but he couldn’t know for sure. Liam had advised to give Harry some time.

Maybe Liam is right. Maybe both Harry and him need time.

A holiday might be just what Louis needs to clear his mind and find out what he really wants, before he hurts Harry again with empty promises.

He takes in the smell of the sea as he drives along the Cote d’Azur. By the time he spots the sign Antibes, he’s terribly tired. Once he’s at the house, he’s going to sleep for days, he promises himself. The house is just outside Antibes, build on a rock, with steps leading down to the private beach. He drives through town and fifteen minutes later he halts in front of the villa. He drags his suitcase with him, lifts the flowerpot to pick up the key, as Gina instructed and steps into the house. There’s a note on the kitchen table telling him there’s food in the fridge and that she’ll be stopping by the next day. Louis walks upstairs with his luggage and opens the door to the bedroom, ‘his bedroom’ and falls down on the bed. He kicks of his shoes, throws his jacket on a chair, pulls off his jeans and climbs under the fresh and cool sheets and falls into a deep sleep.

He awakes to the happy twittering of birds sitting in the trees surrounding the villa. The sun flood in through the thin yellow curtains. He yawns and stretches his arms and back as he steps in the adjoining bathroom to take a quick shower. Everything is still as he remembers it, which makes him feel good. He puts on a white T-shirt and cut off pale blue jeans and walks to the kitchen to make a cup of tea to take with him down to the beach.

Outside it’s very warm, especially compared to the weather in England. He walks over the terrace and takes the steps down to the beach, where he sits on a rock, looking out over sea. He takes a few deep breaths to smell the sea and the lemons, growing on the trees behind him. He watches as boats pass by in the distant. He already feels much calmer if only he could share this moment with Harry; Harry would love it here.

He drinks a bottle of wine with dinner that night, maybe a little more. He sends a smiling selfie to his family and Liam with the sun setting behind him. Then he sends the same selfie to Harry and captions it with ‘wish you were here with me’. He hesitates before sending it, he’s not that drunk yet, but drunk or not... he truly means it.

Not only his room, but the villa too is exactly the same as Louis remembers. Only slight changes like, a new window replacing the old one that got stuck every time you wanted to close it. The deco could use some updating, but Louis doesn’t care. The fading blue wallpaper and the stained tiled floor make it feel as if he’s stepping back in time and that his mum and gran could come in any time.

‘I miss you, mum. I wish I could talk to you for a bit.’ he sighs, as he makes his way to his room.

When the sun rises and wakes Louis, much too early for his liking, he decides to get up and make himself a nice breakfast. His head is a little heavy, but he’s not hungover, thankfully. He eats his eggs and tea on the terrace, watching a couple of birds flying after one another from tree to tree and he can’t help but smile at them. After breakfast he drives into town, walks along the harbour, gapes at the luxury boats lying side by side in the blue water and has lunch at a small restaurant in one of the cobbled side streets leading from the main street.

Bellevue had been his gran’s, inherited from an uncle of hers. She spent many summers here with her family and later with her grandchildren. They had the best of times together. Playing on the private beach, swimming in the sea, eating outside on the terrace with the entire family sitting at a long table, eating, chatting and laughing. They laughed a lot. Walking through town Louis remembers where there used to be a baker who had the best smelling croissants in the entire world. It now is a clothing shop. He finds a small grocery shop and decides to restock. Tea, bread rolls, cheese, milk, snacks. He pays for them at the till and drives back to the house. It’s a lovely ride.The sun is warm, flowers are blooming on both sides of the road in bright colours. The sea looks deep blue from up hill. The soft breeze sweeps his hair back, the sun is warming his bare arms,while he drives to Bellevue. It’s almost a perfect ride, except for… it isn’t. Not without Harry beside him. Harry would sing loudly to the tunes on the radio, while leaning his head back enjoying the ride. Louis smiles to himself, he can picture them together in the car, driving to Bellevue. How did he survive the past two years without him? He doesn’t know the answer.

***

He’s lazing on a lounger, eyes closed, a bottle of water under his chair and a book lying in the sand next to the chair. He’s been unable to focus on the story. The tide is out, a long stretch of sand separates Louis from the sea. He has just decided to take a dip into the blue water, to cool off, when he hears voices in the distant, coming from sea. They’re very close, Louis opens his eyes, squinting against the sunlight when sees a small fisher-boat approaching ‘his beach’. He’s not expecting any visitors. He wonders who it is. It can’t be Gina, she came in earlier and already left.

One of the men signals he can’t get any closer. The other man shakes his hand and pulls a backpack onto his shoulders as he steps out of the boat carefully, knee deep into the water as his long legs bring him closer to the beach. The fisherman sails away. Louis puts on his sunglasses to get a better look at the unexpected guest. He stands up. The tall man wears shorts, a T-shirt, sunglasses and his dark brown curls wave in the soft breeze.At that moment Louis’ heart stops. It’s Harry.

‘Harry? You’re... here?’ Louis is baffled and a little nervous too. Harry has now reached the beach and stands in front of him, with a shy smile he looks at Louis.

‘Yeah… I got a text, saying you wish I was here…. So… here I am.’ Harry says, biting his bottom lip.

Louis’ cheeks turn red at Harry’s words. ‘I can’t believe it.’ he almost whispers. ‘I’m dreaming.’

‘No, I’m here.’ Harry replies shyly. ‘I hope it’s alright…’ He rubs his neck.

‘Yes! Yes… It’s perfect. You’re perfect.’ Louis says and then begins to laugh. ‘Oh my God, what an entrance you just made, like straight out of a romantic movie. ‘ He giggles and Harry too bursts out in laughter.

‘Must be all the romantic stuff I’m surrounded by all the time.‘ Harry says sheepishly.

‘Let’s go inside and get you something to drink and eat.’ Harry follows Louis up the steps to the house and places his backpack in the corner near the stairs.

They sit on the terrace looking out over the sea.

‘It’s beautiful here.’ Harry says as he sips from his drink.’I can see why you came here. It’s quiet, but not too quiet.’

‘Time to think is exactly what I needed, but there was something missing. I kept thinking about you; how much you’d like it here, the beach, the sea, the food, the sunsets. And… how much I missed you. Harry… I’m so sorry for how I treated you and for what happened.’

‘I know.’ Harry sighs deeply, looking up at Louis with tired eyes. Now that he can take a good look at the man in front of him, he sees black lines under his eyes. Louis grabs Harry’s hands and holds them in his.

‘Look, I still don’t remember that night entirely. I know I kissed you and I remember touching you and .. I shouldn’t have done that. I don’t remember what I said to you that night and that makes me feel awful, because I know from the reactions I got from Liam and Niall that I made promises I didn’t keep. I’m so sorry, Harry...’

Harry’s eyelids flutter, the long lashes spill over his cheeks. ‘Yeah. I was devastated.I couldn’t believe you’d do that to me. Louis, I’ve been in love with you for what feels like forever. That night…, it meant everything to me. You said you loved me too and that you didn’t want to get married, you’d call the wedding off and that you wanted to be with me…’

‘Oh God! I’m a horrible man, selfish. I hurt both you and Eleanor, because I was too scared to withdraw a marriage proposal I shouldn’t have done in the first place, on a night out, drunk and in front of my friends. The next day I already knew it was a mistake, but El was so happy and called everyone to tell them we were engaged and soon, I felt it was too late to withdraw. I think Liam knew from the start. And then he planned the weekend for us. Harry, when I saw you at the airport…. I think it was then that I realised how much I had missed you and I was taken aback by your appearance. You’re so beautiful, I couldn’t keep my eyes off of you the entire weekend and by Saturday night I knew I was marrying the wrong person. The warm feelings, the love, the friendship, companionship and attraction I felt with you, I never felt before with anyone. But I was wrong to step into your bed when I was about to get married to someone else. I never should have done that. Will you ever be able to forgive me? For the way I behaved? For hurting you? Do you think we can start again somehow?’ Louis’ voice ends in a desperate whisper.

Harry doesn’t speak right away. There are unshed tears in his eyes and Louis needs to suppress the urge to walk around the table and take Harry in his arms. 

‘I… it wasn’t all your fault, Louis. I was there. I asked you to come into my room after we shared a kiss in the hall. We were both wasted. I remember everything clearly. It was the best night of my life, but also … it felt wrong. And when you woke up and appeared to be shocked we were in bed together… well, then I knew for sure it had been wrong. That’s why I left.’

‘What a mess I made.’ Louis says, still holding Harry’s hands. ‘Harry, you don’t have to answer straight away, but I’d like to take you out on a real date, get to know you better… in a romantic way. I already know you’re a sweet and amazing man, and…”

‘Yes, I’d love to go out on a date with you… tonight?’ Harry interrupts him with a big smile.

‘Oh...OH!’ Louis grins goofily and a little astonished.

‘Why do you think I travelled all the way here, if I didn’t want us to be together, you idiot?‘’ Harry says fondly. Louis blushes and stammers.

“Uh….good, eh… well, what about we shower, put on some nice clothes and I’ll take you to the best restaurant in town?’

‘Great plan!’

***

‘So … tell me, how on earth did you get that fisherman to sail you to the villa?’ Louis asks with a smirk after they’ve finished their dinner on the terrace of a small restaurant with views over the harbour and enjoy a drink afterwards. Harry giggles.

‘I came in by train, but couldn’t find a bus or taxi to take me to the villa, so I used my charm and asked several fishermen in my best French, if they could please take me to the villa and that it was a surprise for the man who stayed there. They all laughed at me first,but then one of them agreed to sail me to Bellevue.’ Harry tells him triumphantly.

Louis giggles.

‘It sure was a grand entrance, love. I’ll never forget it. And… how did you get the address, hmm?’

‘Lottie loves me and so does Liam.’ Harry winks.

‘Traitors, the pair of them.’ Louis replies smilingly. ‘Your charm is just irresistible, I can’t blame them.’

Harry blushes.

They spend the next two weeks together in the villa, going on trips, having dinner together on the terrace, watching the sun set, making love to each other at night, waking up together in the same bed, kissing, cuddling and just enjoying each other.

Louis finds out that Harry is a great cook, an amazing cuddler and a fantastic lover. That Harry is horrible at giving directions and that he gets lost easily in the narrow cobbled streets of the town. He charms the old ladies in town easily, gets free croissants from the boulangerie just by flashing a bright smile, that he is a messy ice cream eater and Louis can’t help it, but he loves all these versions of Harry very much.

Those two weeks in France will always be cherished in their hearts as the place where they found true love.


	4. Epilogue

_**Bellevue, Antibes, three years later** _

‘Louis! Where are my cufflinks? I can’t find them.’ Harry is about to go on his knees in his beautiful pink suit, to look under the bed.

‘Harry, love, calm down. They’re here in the box on the nightstand.’ Louis points at the small box, while he puts on his jacket.

Harry sits down on the bed.

‘Weddings are nerve wrecking.’ He says gravely. Louis chuckles and gives him a kiss on the head.

‘Let me help you and then we’ll go down to meet our family and friends who are waiting for us at the beach.’ Louis helps Harry with the cufflinks and his jacket. He holds out his hand for Harry to take and softly pulls his fiancé with him downstairs and to the terrace.

A violinist is playing a love song. Together they walk down the steps to the beach where their family and friends are waiting, sitting on chairs smiling at them as they walk hand in hand to the minister.

They keep smiling and looking at each other as the minister holds his speech and when he asks.

“Do you Louis William Tomlinson take Harry Edward Styles to be your husband? Will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health, for richer, for poorer, for better, for worse, in sadness and in joy, to cherish and continually bestow upon him your heart’s deepest devotion, forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto his as long as you both shall live?’ Louis answers loud and clear for everyone to hear, while he looks at Harry.

‘I do!’

Harry giggles nervously, but he too states loud and clear ‘I do!’ when asked.

‘Finally…’ Harry sighs into the kiss that seals the marriage. Louis has never felt happier than right there in that moment. He’s found true love.


End file.
